Introduction
Another “cunning” dinner, the usual compliment of
guests—but wait! What's this?
The placid evening meal is split wide open by some
staggering news: woman-hater Harry Harrison and firebrand Alice are engaged!
Certainly this is a pairing as unnatural as The Odd
Couple--in fact one might expect Bettina’s dining room table to split in two at
this thunderclap.
But no. The table stands firm as the party gathers
around to feast on a supposedly festive meal (apparently scavenged from odds
and ends at the back of the refrigerator): leftover fish, fried cakes made of
day-old rice, and a grape juice toast in honor of the love birds!
Part 1
The
Menu
Fish
a la Bettina
Rice
Cakes
Stuffed
Tomato Salad
Rolls
Butter
Iced
Grape Juice
Blueberry
Tarts
Coffee
Preparing the Meal
Fish
a la Bettina
No indecision over what kind of fish to use—I simply
picked up a package of frozen Alaskan cod…
…and
baked the fillets in the oven.
Then I prepared a white sauce…
…and
added the freshly chopped fish.
A
little pimento, some chopped sweet pickles and…
…Fish
a la Bettina!
(the fish was to be served over ‘wafers’, but since no
kind was specified I saved my peace of mind and untold hours of labor by using
Town House Originals).
Rice
Cakes
These are definitely not the modern, fat-free, crunchy (and tasteless) Styrofoam-like
rounds one sees so often. No, these little gems consist of boiled rice molded
into patties, dipped in crumbs, and deep fried. Yummy.
Fortunately
I already had a bowl of plain boiled rice (one of my son’s favorite dishes) in
the refrigerator.
Unfortunately the rice resisted the shaping
process—probably I should have chosen a sticky variety rather than ordinary
long grain. I added milk and sprinkled in some flour, to no avail.
Eventually I was able to squeeze (and I literally mean
squeeze) chunks of rice together into
golf ball-sized balls, coat them with crumbs, and get them into a skillet of
hot fat.
One
ball broke apart from the heat, but the rest more or less stayed together.
After they were browned I maneuvered them out of the pan and onto a plate
covered by a paper towel, to drain.
Stuffed
Tomatoes
Although
the recipe calls for four tomatoes I decided to prepare six. I’ve learned the
hard way that Bettina’s fruits and vegetables tend to be far smaller than
modern specimens, and now I always take that into account.
As
always I started by loosening the skins with a hot-water bath.
Unfortunately
skinning these things was the least of my troubles. They also had to be gutted,
and that didn’t go very well.
I
almost decided to stuff the tomatoes with the red cabbage I already had in my
fridge. Ultimately I changed my mind—red tomatoes stuffed with “red” (really,
purple) cabbage—our eyes might melt at the sight.
Bettina
always chops her cabbage, but I prefer to grate mine.
Mixing
the grated cabbage with a little homemade salad dressing, salt, and paprika…
Ready to stuff those tomatoes!
Rolls
and Butter
By far the easiest item on the menu. These rolls were
purchased for the princely sum of 3/$1.00.
Grape
Juice
A drink in honor of the newly engaged couple. Wine or
champagne would probably be more appropriate, but then A Thousand Ways To Please A Husband WAS published on the eve of
Prohibition…
Blueberry
Tarts
Now these sound good.
Mixing
the berries, vinegar, cinnamon, sugar, and butter.
Believe
it or not this filling needs to be cooked…I suppose to thicken it.
Now for the crust. Once again Bettina fails to give any
recipe and so I flipped back to Chapter 7’s lemon pie.
Traditional
pie crust ingredients: lard, flour, salt.
Blending
the fat into the dry ingredients.
I
can never decide how much “cutting” to do…too much and the crust will become
tough. Too little, and it comes out like this.
At
this point the lard was becoming soft and smeary and I had to refrigerate the
ingredients for a bit to firm the mixture up. Unfortunately it didn’t help
much.
Finally
I did get the dough into a ball and was able to roll it out.
My,
this really shows a professional touch <sarcasm>. The rolled-out dough
stuck, tore, and otherwise misbehaved and so I had to do some major patching.
The
filled tart shells—no Baker of the Year award here.
Coffee
Seems strange to have both coffee and juice at a
single meal, but oh well.
Fill
the percolator basket, fill the pot with water, etc. (I know the process by
heart).
How It Looked
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